<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?><feed xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" ><generator uri="https://jekyllrb.com/" version="3.10.0">Jekyll</generator><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/feed.xml" rel="self" type="application/atom+xml" /><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/" rel="alternate" type="text/html" /><updated>2026-07-17T16:02:37+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/feed.xml</id><title type="html">tom.chadw.in</title><subtitle>Intermittency</subtitle><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><entry><title type="html">Laura’s life</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasLife" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Laura’s life" /><published>2026-05-12T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2026-05-12T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasLife</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasLife"><![CDATA[<h1 id="lauras-life">Laura’s life</h1>

<p>Before we met at university, Laura suffered with ME as she entered sixth form. She missed out on so much, as 
her friends, who saw her frequently and kept her involved of course, nevertheless 
started to go out and socialize while she was immobile at home. After her recovery, as soon as I 
got to know her, I could see she was making up for 
lost time. According to her, she was the one always organizing activities for her 
friends at university. She expressed a certain frustration at the natural 
disinclination of others to make fun plans, but this was couched in a very real and 
wry self-awareness that her drive was unusual and often comic.</p>

<p>We started our life together, and almost everything fun I can tell you about 
that life almost certainly started with her. We hitched to Paris and slept in 
bin-bags under the Eiffel Tower, drinking apparently the only vile 
bottle of wine for sale in France. We walked part of the Ridgeway and drank a pint among the Avebury stones. We 
bought our first house. We got cats. We made each others’ wedding rings. We moved to the remote countryside. We 
learned to sail. We got our first dog. We took a cruise across the North Sea. 
All of these were Laura’s ideas.</p>

<p>It was Laura’s idea to buy a share in a narrowboat. Over twenty years on, 
that ownership is sadly coming to an end against our wishes. I can’t believe it 
will have outlasted her, but it means she got to enjoy it until the end. It was 
one of the best things we ever did, as holiday after holiday was an absolute joy.</p>

<p>Once the children were born, it was Laura who organized activities time and again for 
them both. Alys now has her grade 6 in tap dancing, thanks to Laura starting her 
in lessons when she was four years old. She has been volunteering at Kielder 
Observatory since she was fourteen, and is applying to study astrophysics at university. 
Barnaby loves learning the piano and performing with the Bellingham and District 
Dramatic Society. He will hopefully start volunteering 
with birds of prey once he is old enough, after Laura set the ball rolling.</p>

<p>We went to music festivals, we had holidays abroad, and we had a fabulously 
packed London trip just last year, seeing Shoot From the Hip, The Play That Goes Wrong, and 
Matilda. We camped and walked, and went to Riverdance and the Strictly Come Dancing live show.</p>

<p>Sometimes Laura’s planning was overambitious. Sometimes she was frustrated at 
the lack of time to do what she wanted. She was famously quite astonishingly 
terrible at estimating how long any given task would take. We had holidays of 
which we missed the first two days (out of seven) because of her passionate 
hatred of packing.</p>

<p>Laura supported me through the deaths of my uncle, my dad, my sister, and my 
brother. She took Mum to Chinese watercolour classes after Dad died, and was 
there through Mum’s increasing dementia and eventual move to residential care. 
She was hit so hard by her mum’s death, and looking back, perhaps never 
really recovered from it. None the less, she arranged holidays to Istanbul and 
Toledo for us and her dad.</p>

<p>We went back to the old town on Rhodes last summer, and revisited many places 
with the children which delighted us when we first went in 2000. The day before 
we were due to have a week on the narrowboat in February, the doctor told her 
that she simply must not go. I took the doctor’s advice, and absolutely insisted 
that Laura stay safe with her dad, within reach of medical care and support. 
You will be unsurprised to hear that my insistence fell on deaf ears, and Laura 
enjoyed what turned out to be her last holiday on Willow, again revisiting 
favourite places from the last twenty years.</p>

<p>In the last two weeks before she died, Laura went to stay with her dad to take 
care of him through post-op recuperation. She went with him to buy the plants to 
go in the pots laid with her mum’s ashes. She lost all strength. I knew things 
were more serious than they had ever been as she stopped reading, and was 
sofa-bound, comforted by “crap telly”, as we always described it. But she still 
heard Alys perform a solo piano piece at her school concert. She still spoke 
lucidly and made plans with her manager at work.</p>

<p>Laura has gone, and the hole she leaves in our lives is incalculable. I knew we 
could lose her, but the suddenness has left us baffled. If I can do a tenth of 
what she did with us, I’ll be proud. And she’d be cross that I’d not done more, 
as she always did.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/Laura.jpg" alt="Laura" />
    <figcaption>Laura Chadwin<br />1973-2026</figcaption>
</figure>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[Laura was the planner of the family. Here's just a hint of some of the things she did for us.]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Laura’s history</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasHistory" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Laura’s history" /><published>2026-05-11T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2026-05-11T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasHistory</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasHistory"><![CDATA[<h1 id="lauras-history">Laura’s history</h1>

<p>We met at university, studying Anglo-Saxon, Norse, and Celtic. Laura loved 
Anglo-Saxon history and palaeography. Her love of 
manuscripts started earlier. She described looking at a reproduction 
of the Lindisfarne Gospels with her grandmother. Laura said “It’s so old!”. Her 
grandmother replied “I don’t like it because it’s old, but because it’s beautiful.”</p>

<p>In our last year at university, Laura revived the Troubadours, the university 
medieval music society. She broadened it out from a single hurdy-gurdy player to 
a fabulous group of enthusiastic amateurs. It was important to her to welcome 
everyone, in contrast to some university music groups. It was a highlight of our 
time at university, and we remained in touch with several members.</p>

<p>When Laura moved up to Newcastle after we graduated, her first job was at Past 
Times. She made great use of her staff discount, albeit on less than the minimum wage, a 
couple of years before such a minimum wage existed in this country.</p>

<p>Laura then spent a couple of years in the funding sector, and during that time 
published her article <a href="https://doi.org/10.1484/J.RB.4.00368">Some Anglo-Saxon Cuthbert <em>Liturgica</em>: The Manuscript 
Evidence</a>. 
This prefigured her association with Bede, and built on her work with early music, 
specifically neumatic notation.</p>

<p>Laura then landed the job of Museum and Education Manager at Bede’s World in 
Jarrow. She was thrown in at the deep end, promptly being required to tell some 
of the specialist craftsmen who were building the reconstructed Anglo-Saxon 
village that their work was finished, and their contracts would not be renewed. 
It affected her deeply, as a young southern woman, newly appointed, affecting the 
livelihood of incredibly skilled northern craftsmen.</p>

<p>Laura then did something which probably defined her professional character. She 
knew that the Lottery-funded huge capital project to build an enormous new museum 
was very close to its proposed grand opening. However, she strongly believed that 
the interpretation for the permanent exhibition was not good enough. Laura 
understood the implications of this, and yet told truth to power, in arguing to 
the board that the opening should be postponed. They were persuaded by Laura’s 
authority, and the opening was put back.</p>

<p>Laura then threw herself into every aspect of getting the museum ready for 
opening. She edited, rewrote, and argued every interpretation panel. For her, 
the cardinal importance was to show what an extraordinary place of worldwide 
significance Wearmouth-Jarrow was. She railed against designers’ obsession with 
Vikings, arguing with characteristic dryness that concentrating on the people 
who destroyed monasteries was probably not preferable to celebrating those who 
lived and worked within them.</p>

<p>After a successful opening, Laura worked tirelessly to promote Bede’s World’s primary 
<em>raison d’être</em>: to educate and inspire people about Anglo-Saxon England and Bede. 
Her drive for authenticity was what motivated her. In her time 
at Bede’s World, she edited a new guide book, wrote and collaborated on temporary 
exhibitions, organized academic lectures, and was the voice of authenticity for 
the reconstructed Anglo-Saxon farm.</p>

<p>Laura’s academic side did not preclude the everyday logistics and <em>realpolitik</em> of 
working for an independent museum. She built partnerships and repaired damaged 
relationships. Her funding knowledge was a huge benefit to the museum. She helped 
commission artwork - always authentic to the museum’s core purpose - and brought 
international scholars, curators, musicians, and authors to Jarrow to give talks 
and performances. She smiled as our dog Max barked at John Prescott.</p>

<p>Laura was humbled to work with scholars such as Michelle Brown and Professor Rosemary Cramp. Professor 
Cramp’s death hit Laura harder than she expected it to. She would utterly dismiss 
the comparison, but her standing inside a collapsed septic tank had a similar 
vibe to Professor Cramp weeding the Bede’s World garden.</p>

<p>Laura naturally became centrally involved in the gathering momentum behind the 
bid for World Heritage Status for Wearmouth-Jarrow. When a full-time job was 
created to work on the bid, she knew she had to apply, though she was torn in two 
at the thought of leaving Bede’s World. Several intense years of partnership management, 
academic research and writing, and community building followed.</p>

<p>The World Heritage Status bid was rejected. This hit Laura hard. For it to fail 
after so much work, and for such unfair reasons, was a bitter pill to swallow. 
For her to have left Bede’s World in order to work towards it was very upsetting.</p>

<p>Laura’s professional involvement with Anglo-Saxon history and palaeography 
largely ceased after that. Bede’s World subsequently closed down. While this is 
hardly a disinterested opinion, perhaps it would have survived with such a 
passionately informed historian and multidisciplinarian as Laura back with the 
museum. Who knows?</p>

<p>Laura’s love for history, and Anglo-Saxon in particular, was lifelong. My belief 
is that the long long unpaid hours she worked above and beyond to get the museum 
to a quality fit for opening took its toll on her. She learned a pattern of 
overwork and stress, and this carried on through the rest of her career. But I 
don’t think she would have missed it for the world.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/Laura.jpg" alt="Laura" />
    <figcaption>Laura Chadwin<br />1973-2026</figcaption>
</figure>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[Laura and I met because of her love of Anglo-Saxon history and manuscripts. That love ran through her whole life.]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Laura’s work</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasWork" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Laura’s work" /><published>2026-05-10T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2026-05-10T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasWork</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/LaurasWork"><![CDATA[<h1 id="lauras-work">Laura’s work</h1>

<p>Laura and I met at university, and she agreed, when we graduated, to move up to 
Newcastle from her native Hertfordshire. From the very beginning, work was 
incredibly important to her. She defined herself by it.</p>

<p>Laura started out with a shop job in Eldon Square - do people remember Past 
Times? She also did a little office cleaning work, and served at The Bay Horse 
in Dinnington. She was known as the Cockney Barmaid, and she and the locals found 
their mutual incomprehension of each others’ accents extremely funny.</p>

<p>Laura’s next job was for English Heritage at Bessie Surtees’ House on the Quayside 
in Newcastle. Having moved from ersatz retail heritage to the real thing, she 
sought out opportunities beyond the administrative. Together with her colleague 
and friend Mary, she put on a living-history event for schoolchildren, and she 
worked at Corbridge Roman site as curatorial assistant. She quickly grew to know 
and respect many people at English Heritage and in the wider North-Eastern
heritage sector.</p>

<p>Laura then moved into funding advice at the National Lottery Charities Board 
behind the Live Theatre, close to Swan House Roundabout, and then North Tyneside 
VODA at Linskill in North Shields. I think it was VODA which really cemented her love for her adopted North East. 
She loved helping out small organisations such as the Tynemouth Model Boat 
Club and many, many others. During this time, she also started a law 
course, qualifying in criminal, contract, and I think property law.</p>

<p>Then came the beginning of her career in heritage, perhaps foreshadowed by 
Past Times, when she amazingly landed the job of Museum and Education Manager 
at Bede’s World. The museum had received a multimillion-pound capital grant 
(remember them?) to turn the small Bede Monastery Museum into a major 
attraction. She threw herself into the interpretation for the permanent 
exhibition, and early on had to recommend the postponement of the grand 
opening, not an easy thing to have to say in a new job.</p>

<p>We married in 2001. And around this time, Laura successfully completed an MA 
in Museum Studies. She later had her prime professional focus and commitment acknowledged in her appointment as 
Curator at Bede’s World, later stepping up to Acting Director.</p>

<p>The plan was then devised, and the partnership formed, to bid for World 
Heritage Status for Wearmouth-Jarrow. Laura was appointed jointly by 
Sunderland and North Tyneside councils to work on the bid. The bid was 
ultimately unsuccessful. A lack of support and belief from a key senior individual 
at DCMS combined with an academically inept application assessment guaranteed 
that the bid could not succeed. The assessor’s report described the standing 
Anglo-Saxon remains at Wearmouth-Jarrow as being less significant than those 
at Lindisfarne. There are no standing Anglo-Saxon remains at Lindisfarne. 
Despite this, the Wearmouth-Jarrow board decided not to appeal. Laura strongly 
disagreed with this decision.</p>

<p>It was during Laura’s time at Wearmouth-Jarrow that Alys arrived, as if she 
didn’t have enough on her plate already. Alys’s achievements made her 
prouder than Alys probably knows.</p>

<p>Laura then joined Northumberland National Park Authority, where I worked, to 
build the funding case for The Sill, a new visitor centre on Hadrian’s Wall. 
This marrying of her love of heritage and the countryside with her knowledge 
of funding and the law was an inspiration for her, and she played a big role 
in achieving success. After the failure of the Wearmouth-Jarrow project, this 
was incredibly important to her. I was proud to play a small part in the 
fitting out of the Sill to achieve the vision of which she had been a huge 
part.</p>

<p>A short stint at South Tynedale Heritage Railway followed, and around this time, Barnaby joined us. It was an extremely hard pregnancy, but 
Laura kept working. Barnaby’s apparently bottomless kindness and humour have 
been the hugest joy to Laura. I’m not sure she would have made it this far without Alys and him.</p>

<p>Then followed Laura’s decade at the Arts Council. During her time there, she helped such organizations 
as Beamish, Woodhorn, Bowes Museum, Sunderland Museums, and of course her beloved Jarrow Hall. Much 
like her time at VODA, she loved being involved in the cultural heritage scene 
of the North East and the rest of the country, and her role as Relationships 
Manager dealing specifically with Museums meant that she’d successfully 
continued her professional life in heritage until the end.</p>

<p>This piece concentrates on Laura’s work. It was so unbelievably important to her. 
I have always been, and will always remain, in total awe of what she achieved.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/Laura.jpg" alt="Laura" />
    <figcaption>Laura Chadwin<br />1973-2026</figcaption>
</figure>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[Laura gave much of herself to her work. Everyone who worked with her could see her commitment and expertise.]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Howay the lads!</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/HowayTheLads" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Howay the lads!" /><published>2025-10-17T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2025-10-17T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/HowayTheLads</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/HowayTheLads"><![CDATA[<h1 id="howay-the-lads">Howay the lads!</h1>

<p>During my life, I’ve seen many fabulous players and managers fail to win at Newcastle United: Gazza, Quinn and McGhee, Kelly and Peacock, Beardsley, Cole, Keegan, Big Les and Shearer, Sir Bobby. All legends to us all. But Burn, Isak, and Howe have simply done what I genuinely thought was impossible. While supporting the Toon, I’ve lost my dad, my sister, and my brother. I’ve got married and had two children. I’m a great uncle, for God’s sake. But Big Dan Burn’s header will never fade.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/BDB.jpg" alt="'ave it!" />
    <figcaption>'ave it!</figcaption>
</figure>

<p>Everyone’s talking about the Dan Burn story, as is right. But what about the goal itself? Trippier’s corner was astonishing. Howe said post-match that set pieces hadn’t gone well in training, and you can imagine why. Tripps lined up for a typical right-footer’s inswinger, but instead cut across the ball, slicing it severely to bend it away from goal. To do that with such accuracy to find, not BDB in general, but the specific spot five yards in front and a foot above DBD’s head, is simply astonishing.</p>

<p>Big Dan then had the platform to do so, but to get that header so perfect is one of the greatest things I’ve seen. For a major final, I’m thinking of Keith Houchen in the Eighties. To be brutally honest, I feel the keeper might have had the time to take a another step to his right before the dive, and maybe he could have got it. But there’s the microcosm of the whole match - Liverpool were simply poor. And that header deserved to take a Wembley lead.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/Isak.jpg" alt="We'll always have Wembley" />
    <figcaption>We'll always have Wembley</figcaption>
</figure>

<p>The second goal is getting less attention, but it was such a team goal, and had so many stories behind it, that I love it just as much. Barnes had a lot to live up to, standing in for the criminally idiotic Gordon, and he has often gone missing in matches. Not this time. He held the line to take Tino’s pass, and then returned it round the corner with perfect weight. Tino, who had an absolute blinder all match, then channelled Keith Gillespie against Barcelona, crossing at right-angles to his direction of travel, and falling over in the process. With his weak foot! I can say with certainty that I didn’t have a Murphy knock-down on my card - that header, in its own way, was as impressive as Burn’s goal.</p>

<p>Isak then did what I don’t think I can remember any Newcastle striker ever doing. He made a point of showing that the offside flag correctly shown for his disallowed goal moments before was simply not going to stop him getting his Wembley goal. Again, I just can’t think of many Newcastle strikers who could have kept a half volley like that down, but Isak is quite simply the best striker I’ve ever seen play for us. And after all the plaudits from his other team-mates and the crowd, a silly handshake and the hugest of smiles between Murphy and Isak, perhaps the partnership of the season.</p>

<p>It all went as sour as it ever could with Isak as the summer unfolded. He will be justly vilified when he comes to our place. But he was part of the greatest moment in my supporting life.</p>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[A lifetime's wait comes to an end]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Updatable views in PostgreSQL: Why and how?</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/UpdatableViews" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Updatable views in PostgreSQL: Why and how?" /><published>2023-07-20T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2023-07-20T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/UpdatableViews</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/UpdatableViews"><![CDATA[<h1 id="updatable-views-in-postgresql-why-and-how">Updatable views in PostgreSQL: Why and how?</h1>

<p>A longstanding client requested a minimum viable product (MVP) for updating some of their data via a web front end.</p>

<p>Designing an MVP dictates the quickest development path possible to a deliverable solution. The web front end itself was the MVP, as the database already existed. Not touching the database would give us more time to work on this front-end GUI.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/NorthTyne.jpg" alt="A nice view" />
    <figcaption>A nice view</figcaption>
</figure>

<p>However, there was another stronger reason not to touch the existing database: it is live, the public querying it every day via website and app. It therefore made no sense to try to re-engineer live data for an MVP.</p>

<p>A final reason for not touching the existing database is that it stores the data in question in related tables. While useful for storing richly structured data, this is not ideal for geographical representation, and especially not for spatial use (in other words, on a web map). GIS works with features, expecting them to have a flat list of properties, not related tables of attributes.</p>

<p>My colleague Matt mentioned a technique he had used on the another project for the same client: updatable views. This technique had great potential for this MVP.</p>

<p>Databases store data in tables. Many systems query those tables directly, retrieving the data and presenting it to the user. However, databases also support views. Views don’t have to be of single tables, but can be populated by complex SQL statements. They are often therefore used to gather data from many tables in a highly relational database into a human-readable form. In our case, they solve the problem of converting relational data in the database into flattened properties for the webmap features.</p>

<p>Database views are traditionally read-only. Their primary purpose is the presentation of data to the client. But Matt had mentioned updatable views. How is this done?</p>

<p>This project’s database is PostgreSQL. While at a broad concept level, views are read-only, PostgreSQL does allow views to be updated: passing the updated values to the table on which the view is based. However, <a href="https://www.postgresql.org/docs/15/sql-createview.html">there are severe limitations on which views can handle updates in this way</a>. Our views did not fall within these limitations, so we have to do some more work to get this up and running.</p>

<p>Database triggers are “listeners” which can be assigned to fire when specific events occur. For example, a trigger can be created which fires when a specific table’s data is updated. A trigger function is called, which carries out whatever ancillary function is required – perhaps inserting a row into another table.</p>

<p>A view can have triggers, and although a view is read-only, <em>it can still have a trigger which fires when an UPDATE query is made against it</em>.</p>

<p>This fact opens up a whole model of abstraction within the database itself: store the data in tables, create views, present the views’ data to the client, and <em>query the view for create/review/update/delete (CRUD) operations</em>. Add triggers on the views to call functions to update the tables. This abstraction is extremely valuable in our use-case: we don’t want to touch the underlying data structure at all, but still want to be able to update the underlying data.</p>

<p>So how does it work? For each view which you want to be able to update, create a trigger for each CRUD operation you want to support:</p>

<ul>
  <li>ON BEFORE INSERT</li>
  <li>ON BEFORE UPDATE</li>
  <li>ON BEFORE DELETE</li>
</ul>

<p>We set these triggers to fire BEFORE the events above because none of those SQL operations can succeed on a view: you can’t INSERT, UPDATE, or DELETE something which is read-only. Each trigger calls a respective trigger function which carries out an INSERT, UPDATE, or DELETE on the related tables where the view’s data is stored.</p>

<p>But how do we get the new data which the trigger function needs to update the tables? We coded the client to carry out the following pseudocode:</p>

<p><code>UPDATE view SET view.field = CHANGED_VALUE;</code></p>

<p>This fires the ON BEFORE UPDATE trigger, which calls our custom UPDATE function:</p>

<p><code>UPDATE table SET table.field = CHANGED_VALUE;</code></p>

<p>But how do we pass CHANGED_VALUE from the original query into the triggered function? In PSQL (PostgreSQL’s SQL dialect), we use the NEW keyword:</p>

<p><code>UPDATE table SET table.field = NEW.field;</code></p>

<p>The NEW object has all the same properties as the original UPDATE had columns, with the values assigned in the original query.</p>

<p>And that’s it. We can make our view as complex as we want (I could write a whole post about using CROSSTAB to destructure related tables), and then restructure the flat input and update whatever underlying tables we want. <em>The table structure is never touched.</em></p>

<p>Thanks to Matt for sharing this valuable technique.</p>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[A technique useful both in relational spatial datasets and when you can't change the structure of your database]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Returning to games</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/ReturningToGames" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Returning to games" /><published>2023-03-17T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2023-03-17T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/Gaming</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/ReturningToGames"><![CDATA[<h1 id="returning-to-games">Returning to games</h1>

<p><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viking_Raiders">Viking Raiders</a> was a long time ago. That wonderful, innocent age of gameplay 
alone, and writing games in Basic, is what gave me the career I have today. 
A few forays into PC gaming followed: <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civilization_(video_game)">Civilization</a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars:_Dark_Forces">one of the Star Wars ones</a>, 
<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myst">Myst</a> (completed), and <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Riven">Riven</a> (incomplete) were followed by years of nothing, 
until a little phone gaming (well, really an extension of my middle-aged 
enthusiasm for pool by way of <a href="https://www.miniclip.com/games/8-ball-pool">8 Ball</a>).</p>

<p>The gift from a very kind colleague of an XBox One opened the door a crack. 
Leaving others to their Roblox, I started out with <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Dead_Redemption">Red Dead Redemption</a>, 
which had intrigued me since finding out about it when it launched during 
my non-gaming years.</p>

<p>Red Dead Redemption is simply miraculous. It was my first experience of a 
game both vast in scale and minute in detail. The realism of the trackways 
through a turn-of-the-century Western landscape join with a tangible 
plot and rendering which is good enough to create a reality which compels.
I’m only at the start, but I could watch it for hours.</p>

<figure>
  <picture>
    <img type="image/webp" srcset="/assets/pics/RedDeadRedemption.webp" />
  </picture>
  <figcaption>Red Dead Redemption</figcaption>
</figure>

<p>Red Dead Redemption is hardly suitable fayre for the brood, however. By 
chance, my youngest and I stumbled on <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unravel_(video_game)">Unravel</a>. This game is a natural 
successor to Myst in its beautiful rendering, disguising simple physical 
gameplay. Four factors elevate it way beyond its precursor.</p>

<p>The visuals are simply beautiful: lush, detailed, small in scale but big 
in realization. The real-world physics remind me of the peerless Thrust. 
The complexity of the puzzles verges on the fiendish.</p>

<figure>
  <picture>
    <img type="image/webp" srcset="/assets/pics/Unravel.webp" />
  </picture>
  <figcaption>Unravel</figcaption>
</figure>

<p>But everything is trumped by the profoundly evocative atmosphere. Scandi 
hygge pairs with a gently compelling soundtrack to tell an achingly 
nostalgic story, almost melancholic in its depiction of past childhood.</p>

<p>So that’s me, at least for the moment. I can’t see myself wanting any other 
games until I’ve completed these two. While each has a sequel, only Red 
Dead 2 seems to have a decent reputation. So I think I’ll be set for some 
time. Though the lure of Hadrian’s Wall in <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assassin%27s_Creed_Valhalla">Assassin’s Creed</a> is beguiling.</p>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[Having skipped consoles, the kind gift of an XBox shows me what's changed, and what's still the same]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Alan Garner</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AlanGarner" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Alan Garner" /><published>2023-01-19T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2023-01-19T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AlanGarner</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AlanGarner"><![CDATA[<h1 id="alan-garner">Alan Garner</h1>

<p>I read <em><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Weirdstone_of_Brisingamen">The Weirdstone of Brisingamen</a></em> when I was ten. Like many others, 
fantasy was a passion for a time, and, along with inevitable Tolkien, 
<em>The Weirdstone</em> stuck with me for some years. I remember little about it 
now, other than a sense of darkness.</p>

<p>Many years later, I was lucky to attend <a href="http://alangarner.atspace.org/votd.html">a talk given by Garner</a>. It was a 
storytelling event held in the reconstructed Anglo-Saxon hall of <a href="https://jarrowhall.com/experimental_archaeo/thirlings-hall/">Thirlings</a> 
at <a href="https://jarrowhall.com/">Bede’s World</a> in Jarrow. My older brother had been a Garner fan for years, 
but all I had was that vague childhood half-memory.</p>

<p>Garner’s talk was like nothing I had ever seen or heard. It told of his 
experiences writing his imminent short novel <em><a href="https://www.theguardian.com/books/2003/oct/18/fiction.alangarner">Thursbitch</a></em>. 
I’ve never before or since heard someone hold the room so completely, as 
he dug us down into the earth of his new book.</p>

<p>After reading <em>Thursbitch</em>, I sought out all of Garner’s fiction. <em>The Weirdstone</em> 
didn’t stand up wonderfully well to an adult reader, and the other two 
children’s books were similarly unmemorable. <em><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Stone_Book_Quartet">The Stone Book Quartet</a></em> gave a 
glimpse of what was to come, in its peerless evocation of childhood.</p>

<p>Then came <em><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Owl_Service">The Owl Service</a></em>. I confess almost to having my breath taken away 
while reading this short book for the first time. The Welsh valleys act as a 
protagonist, perhaps emphasized to this English reader in the contrast drawn 
between its middle-class English and working-class Welsh characters. Class, 
and cultural and intellectual hatred, 
soak every character, and I had my first glimpse of Garner’s horrific 
perception of his childhood and adolescent self, and his unwavering certainty 
in his own intellectual superiority. It’s a tough read, but a compelling one.</p>

<p><em>The Owl Service</em> is rightly remembered, of course, for how it sinks 
its landscape and protagonists through the fabric of history and nature. This 
is Garner’s genius. Even in this early work, he creates echoes 
between ages, made concrete in elemental man-made objects. His is the liminal 
world between the natural and the unexplained. And that threshold is one of 
horror.</p>

<p><em>The Owl Service</em> is everything which Jacqueline Wilson fails to achieve. It’s 
a children’s book about misery and anger. <em><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Shift_(novel)">Red Shift</a></em> takes these themes to another 
level for a slightly older audience.</p>

<p><em>Red Shift</em> strips out the bucolic setting of <em>The Owl Service</em>, rejecting its 
beauty for the industrial hinterland of Garner’s beloved Cheshire. The themes 
of class and intellectual snobbery infect one of the three narratives which 
run in parallel and intersect in this disturbing, upsetting, and raging work.</p>

<p>Each strand distances itself from the reader quite deliberately in its characters’ 
language. Modern-day irritating intellectualism, seventeenth-century Cheshire 
dialect, and US military jargon in the mouths of Roman legionaries all unsettle.</p>

<p><em>Red Shift’s</em> multiple narratives allow Garner, quite astonishingly, to place massively 
greater emphasis on the echoes and touches between ages, again channelled through 
the ancient man-made. However, because of the explicit narratives in different 
periods of history, this totemic relationship is set free to become vastly more 
impressionistic. The conscious uncertainty amplifies his 
central theme of inter-generational historic emotional resonance to an astonishing 
degree, and the book chills with dread.</p>

<p>The splitting of the narrative into three allows and requires Garner’s overweaning 
evocation of place to sharpen and localize from <em>The Owl Service</em>’s Welsh Valleys to 
<em>Red Shift</em>’s Mow Cop. Again, the historic and man-made act as a conduit between ages, 
in both the land and the ancient axe-head, which inherits the mantle from <em>The Owl Service</em>’s 
megalith and spear-head.</p>

<p><em>Red Shift</em> is despair. “Not really now not any more.”</p>

<p>As described, I read <em>Thursbitch</em>, last in this undeclared trilogy, before the other 
two. I was still buzzing with dread and fascination from Garner’s mesmerizing talk.</p>

<p><em>Thurbitch</em> pares Red Shift’s three parallel narratives down to two. The present-day 
protagonists have continued to age with Garner, and death is constant. While hateful snobbery persists, 
Garner’s characters recede, and his land looms ever larger. <em>The Owl Service</em> had the 
iconic Welsh valleys. <em>Red Shift</em> had a local curiosity and landmark. <em>Thursbitch</em> gives 
its name to the novel, but is otherwise unremarked, to the best of my knowledge. 
The landscape’s lack of historic or monumental significance 
allows the novel’s setting to drop all cultural baggage and creep its own quietly 
screaming path. The horror of <em>The Owl Service</em>’s myths, and of <em>Red Shift</em>’s history, 
becomes purely of <em>Thurbitch</em>’s earth.</p>

<p>Again, the ancient man-made bridges the narratives and the ages. The seventeenth-century 
Cheshire dialect, crisp and lilting in <em>Red Shift</em>, becomes rhythmical and beguiling in 
<em>Thursbitch</em>. While the former’s characters battled <em>in extremis</em>, the latter’s chthonic 
archetypes mutter and lilt, “think on”.</p>

<p><em><a href="https://www.theguardian.com/books/2021/nov/01/treacle-walker-by-alan-garner-review-the-book-of-a-lifetime">Treacle Walker</a></em> 
was up for last year’s Booker. To me, it was the faintest echo of the 
unflinching horror of this most English trilogy. If Garner had won, in my mind, it would have been 
in recognition of these unforgettable books.</p>

<p><em>Walk and do. Walk and do. Walk and do till all is done.</em></p>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[The greatest living English author? Certainly the most astonishing speaker and three novels.]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">Green sanity</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/GreenSanity" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="Green sanity" /><published>2022-10-14T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2022-10-14T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/GreenSanity</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/GreenSanity"><![CDATA[<h1 id="green-sanity">Green sanity</h1>

<p>My <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/leigh-mclaren-brierley-80272236/">esteemed colleague Leigh</a> prompted us to embrace the colour green 
to raise awareness of <a href="https://www.who.int/campaigns/world-mental-health-day/2022">World Mental Health Day</a> this Monday just past.
This resonated with me. While currently owning no green clothing 
other than <a href="https://www.moorlandhosiery.com/">my socks</a>, I thought writing, not wearing, might contribute.</p>

<p>I don’t know where it started, but green’s always been my joy. 
Perhaps Dad’s insistence that green was his lucky colour 
initially hooked me. He would wear a green tie on occasions when he 
hoped for luck, along with green cufflinks. I tried that with 
underwear on Newcastle matchdays. It worked as well as could be 
hoped.</p>

<p>These days, a couple of tangential greens make me happy. We were 
invited into <a href="https://www.greenhaughprimaryschool.co.uk/">Greenhaugh Primary School</a> to hear the children read and 
sing for the first time since lockdown. <a href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/ShowUp">I’ve written about Greenhaugh 
before</a>, and while all of our mental 
health undoubtedly suffered in the fight to save it, the fight was 
worthwhile, and this visit lifted my spirits.</p>

<p>I used to play football extremely badly. Moving into the middle of 
nowhere twenty years ago (not to mention <em>anno Domini</em>) made this harder, and it fell by the wayside. 
I didn’t realize how much I missed participating in a competitive game 
until I was asked to join the mighty <a href="https://www.theblackcockinnatfalstone.com/">Blackcock</a> 
pool team. Perennially bottom of the league, the green baize 
nevertheless calls me, and I love the game.</p>

<p>But it’s green in its common meaning which lies at the heart of the 
matter, of course. Someone once commented that one’s happiest childhood 
memories are never indoors. Camping and narrowboating certainly rank 
among mine.</p>

<p>Although I grew up a city boy, my wife 
persuaded me to move into the green yonder. While we worried that we 
both might struggle, in truth we’ve never looked back.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/NorthTyne.jpg" alt="Home" />
    <figcaption><a href="https://www.gutenberg.org/files/289/289-h/289-h.htm#chap05">Dulce domum</a></figcaption>
</figure>

<p>She had form. A short break as students had us walking a portion of 
the Ridgeway, from Swindon to Avebury via Uffington. Sunburn and blisters 
didn’t dilute the joy of a slow journey through the English 
countryside.</p>

<p>We doubled down on narrowboating, and have been on the canals several 
weeks a year for over fifteen years. Landscape and nature are balm. 
Seeing HS2 carving swathes through the South Oxford summit was one of 
my saddest memories.</p>

<p>When I commuted, <a href="https://twitter.com/tomchadwin/status/1354018739960901633">a random tweet made me count up the number of 
waterways I crossed each day</a>.
That commute was of course a burden, but it was a beautiful one, almost 
running the entire course of the North Tyne. Getting Max the dog soon 
after we moved meant four daily walks, and inspired <a href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AWalkWithoutMax">another</a>.</p>

<p>Many years of the Big Garden Birdwatch partially scratched the 
perennial itch for collection and documentation (I still delight in 
nuthatches, siskins, and the very occasional long-tailed tit), but I 
was happiest to compile <a href="https://twitter.com/tomchadwin/status/1139896195965472768">a list of every wildflower I could see in the verges of our 
single-track road</a>.</p>

<p>Mum said she once heard a professor say on the radio that she firmly 
believed that if you take an interest in the natural world, it will 
hold your interest for the rest of your life. <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Maturin">Maturin</a> would agree.</p>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[A few days after World Mental Health Day, I find it a no-brainer to associate my own mental health with something green.]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">qgis2web: The Story So Far</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/qgis2webTheStorySoFar" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="qgis2web: The Story So Far" /><published>2019-10-30T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2019-10-30T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/qgis2webTheStorySoFar</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/qgis2webTheStorySoFar"><![CDATA[<h1 id="qgis2web-the-story-so-far">qgis2web: The Story So Far</h1>

<figure class="floatright">
    <img src="/assets/pics/qgis2webLogo.png" alt="qgis2web" />
</figure>

<p>qgis2web has now been downloaded from the official QGIS plugins repository 
over half a million times. It’s the sixth most downloaded QGIS plugin of all 
time. This is a short piece about its history.</p>

<h2 id="qgis2leaf-and-qgis-ol3">qgis2leaf and qgis-ol3</h2>

<p>In 2014, Riccardo Klinger created qgis2leaf, which exported QGIS projects to 
Leaflet webmaps. Around the same time, Victor Olaya created qgis-ol3, which 
did the same, but exported to OpenLayers webmaps. I got involved with 
qgis2leaf, as we needed it for work (adding support for WFS, as I recall). 
I’d never coded in Python or used Qt before, nor used git, but as languages 
and source control systems go, they’re easier than many.</p>

<p>Riccardo and I continued to work on qgis2leaf intensively, adding considerably 
to its functionality. It was a really exciting time for me. Learning to code 
in Python (albeit not at all well) was fine, but what I’d never really 
experienced before, as an amateur coder, was having the public use code I had 
written. It was a big step, but a good one, having to deal with issues 
reported by users I had never met, and never would.</p>

<h2 id="qgis2web-is-born">qgis2web is born</h2>

<p>In 2015, Paolo Cavallini, now chair of the QGIS Project Steering Committee, 
got in touch with Victor, Riccardo, and me to suggest that it would help users 
if qgis2leaf and qgi-ol3 were merged. Both did essentially the same thing, but 
using a different Javascript webmapping library. We all agreed, and work 
started on qgis2web. Huge thanks are due to Paolo for the suggestion and 
support.</p>

<p>qgis-ol3 had a GUI with more functionality than qgis2leaf. Specifically, it 
had a preview window. This was important, as there was a huge benefit in 
migrating qgis2leaf to the same GUI. It meant that the proposed merge had 
advantages for qgis2leaf (as was), as well as for end users. This certainly 
motivated me, as did Victor’s elegant Python in qgis-ol3.</p>

<p>I lifted all the qgis2leaf code, placed it alongside the qgis-ol3 code, and 
slightly altered the GUI to allow users to switch between the two. It worked, 
but really was in essence two plugins side-by-side, with all the duplication 
that implies.</p>

<h2 id="improvements-and-tests">Improvements and tests</h2>

<p>Over time, common functions from the two original plugins were deduplicated, 
and the code became a little less unwieldy. However, I worried about releasing 
buggy versions–it did happen once or twice. I had become aware of automated 
testing, via a service called Travis, hooked into Github. The idea is that, 
every time a change is made to the source code, a suite of tests is run to 
ensure that no regressions have been caused.</p>

<p>I thought for some time that this would be an incredibly useful service for 
qgis2web. With so many variables (layer types, renderers, styles, options), 
it was already impossible to be rigorous in checking manually that nothing was 
broken.</p>

<p>With a lot of help from Akbar Gumbira, we finally got it all up and running. 
It fundamentally changed the reliability of qgis2web across versions, even 
though wrangling code and reference output files can sometimes be frustrating.</p>

<h2 id="collaboration-and-support">Collaboration and support</h2>

<p>Paolo remained a big supporter of qgis2web. As part of a Faunalia contract, he 
commissioned Nyall Dawson to work on the plugin. This was brilliant news, but 
the idea of a QGIS core dev looking at my code was also somewhat daunting. 
Sure enough, Nyall fundamentally refactored the entire plugin, decoupling the 
GUI from the export process. His work remains to this day, and the plugin is 
the stronger for it. I must also give credit to both Jürgen Fischer and Matteo 
Ghetta for their help during this period of development.</p>

<p>It must be said that this work did expose some inherent limitations of 
qgis2web for some projects. At the end of the day, QGIS, Leaflet, and 
OpenLayers are very different pieces of software, and the area of functional 
overlap between the three is significantly smaller than the functionality of 
each individually. If there were one constant frustration in working on a 
piece of software used widely by strangers, it would be the struggle to manage 
expectations, especially given that many users have strong GIS knowledge, but 
less strong knowledge of the web and its inherent performance limitations.</p>

<h2 id="qgis3">QGIS3</h2>

<p>The changes from QGIS2 to QGIS3 were enormous. Python was upgraded from v2 to 
v3, and Qt from v4 to v5. In addition, so many things in the QGIS API changed. 
It was a massive job to produce a compatible version of qgis2web, and it would 
have been basically impossible for me without the Travis testing environment. 
However, it all got done, and the concomitant tidying and refactoring of the 
source code was a massive collateral benefit.</p>

<p>There have been two major version upgrades to OpenLayers and one to Leaflet 
during qgis2web’s life, and another OpenLayers one is imminent. The work never 
stops.</p>

<h2 id="burnout">Burnout</h2>

<p>After the big push to make a QGIS3-compatible version, I did slow down. The 
eighty-twenty rule kicked in, with remaining issues being either less 
significant or harder to solve. My attention was also elsewhere (but still 
using QGIS!). As a result, development slowed down significantly.</p>

<p>Things have picked up again, but I doubt I’ll work as intensively on it again. 
It’s frustrating, but we’re all human.</p>

<h2 id="significant-help">Significant help</h2>

<p>Many other people have contributed to qgis2web. I specifically want to mention 
a few here, and apologies to those I miss out through forgetfulness.</p>

<p>Luca Casagrande coauthored qgis-ol3 with Victor. He has continued to support 
qgis2web, including fixing some problems which totally had me stumped. He also 
worked on qgis2web with Paolo at a QGIS developer’s meeting.</p>

<p>Nathan Woodrow wrote a module from scratch to convert QGIS expressions into 
Javascript, and hence make them available in qgis2web. It’s a beautiful bit of 
code, all the more impressive since I get the impression that Nathan doesn’t 
really work with Javascript.</p>

<p>Thomas Gratier wrote an OpenLayers plugin from scratch to allow searching by 
layer attributes. Handling the diversity of possible search sources was a 
challenge, which he overcame effortlessly.</p>

<p>Per Liedman wrote a Leaflet plugin from scratch to support multiple symbol 
layers. He also helped a great deal in implementing Leaflet.VectorGrid to 
support vector tiles.</p>

<p>Iván Sánchez Ortega has been a huge help also in Leaflet.VectorGrid and more 
generally in Leaflet and vector tile matters.</p>

<p>Ola Kovalev made significant contributions including developing OpenLayers 
clustering from scratch. Ola is notable in being happy to learn and then 
implement tests alongside her work, going through the same occasionally 
frustrating learning process that I had.</p>

<p>Paul Dos Santos implemented overall map styling from scratch. One of my 
frustrations is not having taken his work further–a fairly simple task, but 
one which never seems to get to the top of the list.</p>

<p>Martin Boos wrote and maintains the QGIS plugin Vector Tiles Reader, without 
which none of the vector-tile functionality of qgis2web would be possible.</p>

<p>Ed Boesenberg developed multi-unit measurement in OpenLayers, and also 
deserves massive thanks for his constant help in answering queries on the 
qgis2web repo.</p>

<h2 id="new-maps">New maps</h2>

<p>For the first time since it was created, qgis2web has a new output format. 
Mapbox GL JS excels at rendering vector tiles, and has many other key 
advantages over Leaflet and OpenLayers. However, it should not be used 
indiscrimiately, as the other two libraries still have their advantages. In 
addition, the currently implemented feature-set for Mapbox GL JS in qgis2web 
is much, much smaller than that implemented for Leaflet or OpenLayers. This 
will improve over time, but is unlikely to be quick. I hope to write a 
separate piece investigating the core differences between the three libraries, 
but that’s a job for another day.</p>

<p>Huge thanks are due once again to Victor Olaya, who has developed bridge-style 
at GeoCat. It does all the style conversion work, and I can see qgis2web 
offloading its OpenLayers and Leaflet style conversion code to it in the 
future. Other projects will then be able to make use of the routines.</p>

<p>A quick note, by way of clarification. Mapbox, the company, provide many 
services. Mapbox GL JS is one of their products, and is completely open 
source. qgis2web only exports standalone Mapbox GL JS maps. It doesn’t use any 
Mapbox services–no hosting, no styles, no data. It’s key to refer to the 
export format as Mapbox GL JS, to keep it distinct from Mapbox the company and 
its ecosystem of hosted services. Many thanks to Vladimir Agafonkin for 
putting me in touch with Kathleen Lu at Mapbox, to ensure that Mapbox are 
happy with the approach.</p>

<h2 id="where-next">Where next?</h2>

<p>Developing more functionality for the new Mapbox GL JS exporter is top of the 
list for me, as qgis2web has reached some level of maturity with its Leaflet 
and OpenLayers exports (though <em>one day</em> we might get layer groups working 
properly). There will no doubt be many issues with Mapbox GL JS exports, so 
handling those will probably also take priority.</p>

<p>More important than these, however, is making qgis2web’s capabilities more 
readily transparent to the user. We need massively improved error reporting, 
with an emphasis on feedback on unsupported QGIS features in an export. 
Alongside this, a compatibility table would also help users decide which 
export format to choose. With the launch of the new Mapbox GL JS exporter, 
this has now become much more critical.</p>

<p>And documentation, obviously.</p>

<h2 id="bellwether">Bellwether</h2>

<p>Beyond the code itself, I’m extremely proud of qgis2web for a couple of other 
reasons. One is having turned code into software–in other words, supporting 
users, implementing testing, and also promotion, which is a big part of the 
project. Documentation still lags horribly, but that’s a badge of honour for 
an open-source project.</p>

<p>Above all, though, I’m proud that qgis2web represents consistent growth in a 
sector I love–open-source, provider-agnostic software. To my delight, there 
has been no real plateau in growth:</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/qgis2webDownloads.png" alt="qgis2web downloads over time" />
    <figcaption>qgis2web downloads over time</figcaption>
</figure>

<p>Despite the recent Google Maps price hike, the trend away from 
non-provider-based webmaps sadly continues. qgis2web tries its best to help 
those who want to remain truly independent and in control.</p>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[On qgis2web's 500,000th download, it seems a fitting time to look back at how qgis2web got where it is today.]]></summary></entry><entry><title type="html">A walk without Max</title><link href="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AWalkWithoutMax" rel="alternate" type="text/html" title="A walk without Max" /><published>2019-06-07T00:00:00+00:00</published><updated>2019-06-07T00:00:00+00:00</updated><id>https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AWalkWithoutMax</id><content type="html" xml:base="https://tom.chadw.in/wrote/AWalkWithoutMax"><![CDATA[<h1 id="a-walk-without-max">A walk without Max</h1>

<p>Walking further out of town on the road where I work, you climb a hill to some 
woods. You can avoid the main road and find more interesting ways to get 
there, but my walk without Max today only really started after the climb. 
Limited lunch time meant we used to drive up each day, until my guilt at 
unnecessary driving pushed us to alternative routes, and this walk was 
consigned to our past together.</p>

<p>An unprepossessing start, parking in a muddy narrow layby, and tiptoeing 
nervously along a short stretch of fast rural road with no pavement, leads to 
a wide track. Straight as an arrow, it runs at right-angles to the road, into 
the forest. At the junction is a gloriously overgrown cottage, with improbable 
bamboo hedge.</p>

<p>I’ve never liked forests much. The trees obscure the land and the sun, and 
one’s horizon is shortened. Pragmatism won the day, though, as tree cover has 
its benefits in the English climate. Max was black and tan, so as well as 
protection from inevitable rain, some shade was also welcome on our summer 
walks.</p>

<p>While the wide track marches on into the distance, various openings in the 
stone wall to the right grant access into the forest itself. One can pick out 
any number of routes, but the functionally redundant parallel course to the 
track always suited us best.</p>

<p>Where this almost-path rejoins the main track, a wider forest path slopes down 
to the right. Taking various measures to avoid incursions of water, one 
passes what I can only imagine are four redwoods. What these giants are doing 
among this otherwise commonplace English plantation is a mystery, and a 
beguiling one.</p>

<p>The path narrows as it skirts the private grounds of the large house at the 
heart of the woods, and then slopes further downhill. This path seems 
ancient – a wide holloway, again very straight, ending at a tiny stream.</p>

<p>I paused here, as here is compensation for the lack of view so far. Through a 
fence is open countryside, of the most beautiful rolling English kind. Max and 
I would always pause here, I to smile as my heart was lifted by the view, he 
impatiently. I never found out what horizon was revealed, and this view 
remains to this day precious to me, as a shared memory with him, silent and 
content. Today it’s just me.</p>

<p>Across the stream, the path flattens out, as it gently curves round to the 
left. This is more traditional forest pathwork, not the ageless sunken path we 
just descended. But to the right, a fork slopes sharply down.</p>

<p>We must have walked on past this fork hundreds of times, but one day, taking a 
break from over-cheerful enthusiasm from a software trainer, we turned right. 
The gradient rapidly increasing, the path became narrower and narrower, 
steeper and rougher, descending a conifer-root stairway, and nearly meriting 
the sit-and-slide approach.</p>

<p>As a younger man with a young mongrel, evidently largely collie, I scampered 
down this path. For years after, I couldn’t find it again. But three years 
ago, Max and I being older and more nervous, the ground slippery with falling 
rain, and with my nine-month-old son strapped to my chest, the precipitous 
nature of this descent was all too apparent.</p>

<p>I wasn’t going to turn back, though. Max and I had not been here for maybe ten 
years, and I wanted him to see it again. Sentimental thoughts of sharing it 
with my son, and even of this being a boys’ trip out, made me slither down.</p>

<p>My wife and I do everything together, with our family. These weekday lunchtime 
walks with Max were my time without her, without talk. Max and I would cover 
the ground, and see where our journey took us. I wonder if one day I’ll take 
my daughter here. She’d love it, but life gets in the way, and there is a 
little part of me that wants to keep this walk to myself. Me and Max. Today 
it’s just me.</p>

<p>The worst of the sheer path negotiated, this break from IT training yielded 
the most amazing surprise. An unexpected river, with yellow sandstone cliffs, 
and a sandbank shore in the bend. This felt like our own discovery. Today was 
only the third time I’ve ever been there, and it still takes my breath away. I 
jumped onto an island stone to be surrounded by the flow, and saw a tiny fish 
dart away.</p>

<p>Water makes me think of my dad. He was in love with the sea, but moderated his 
passion to rivers and canals in order to devise family holidays my mum would 
not flat-out refuse to join out of terror. Today would have been his 89th 
birthday. I had planned to go down to the abbey to sit for a moment in my 
perplexed atheism and remember his faith and love of church music. This felt 
more like common ground.</p>

<p>Back up—climbing easier than descending—I rejoined the long left-hand bend of 
the main path. Each of the three times I’ve done this walk, this long section 
has tested my mettle. I’ve no map (ironically). I don’t want a map. The first 
time, I wanted to see where paths took me, and each subsequent time, each 
separated by years, I long to see whether something in my sense of direction 
keeps me right.</p>

<p>Though devoid of landscape, nature entertains me today: a squirrel, a robin, 
and hundreds of thousands of wood ants and their anthills half my height are 
the distraction I need to settle my nerves.</p>

<p>Eventually, my faith is paid off. The continued gentle curve to the left felt 
like the right direction, and rather splendidly here we are, at the far end of 
that first arrow-straight track. Intriguingly it’s a crossroads. I’m not sure 
I can ever foresee an occasion when I’ll have the time to go straight on or 
turn right. Left it is.</p>

<p>I’ve been worrying about my age and health a little recently, for the first 
time. Being closer to fifty than forty, coupled with an increased rate of 
consumption of my personal vices (fat, salt, chocolate, and alcohol) has led 
to a feeling of slowing down. I’ve become aware in the last couple of weeks 
that I now make a noise when bending over, straightening up, or standing up 
out of a chair. I think I’m safe finally to identify as middle-aged.</p>

<p>For years and years, I defined male middle age as “that quality which compels 
a man to describe the death of former pets to younger women and girls”. This 
walk without Max confirms it.</p>

<p>To combat my lack of condition, I pick up the pace. I’ve always run up and 
down stairs, and had also become upset to realize that I’d unthinkingly 
stopped. So, the pace is upped when I can, and while the drink will remain, 
perhaps I can stave off the inevitable.</p>

<p>A little way along this unwavering mile, the manmade glory of this walk rears 
up to the left. A magnificence of Scots baronial has crossed the border. How 
can a house need so many chimneys, and so tall? And who doesn’t love a turret? 
Presumably this is the house whose owner planted the redwoods on the far side 
of the grounds.</p>

<p>Pound back to the main road. Turn right down the hill. While Max and I would 
by now be in the car, both drivers and walkers are now granted the most 
magnificent view of this Northumberland market town. No castle, but an abbey 
and old gaol offset the white-elephant empty hospital and inevitable vast 
supermarket.</p>

<p>Nothing else remains. Nearly back at work, the far side of the road offers the 
steep muddy footpath which starts what became Max’s and my later walk 
together. Its close forest perspectives are occasionally interrupted by 
beautiful views of pasture, and intriguing cliffs and ponds possibly bear 
witness to historic quarrying.</p>

<p>This walk with Max was what told me he was dying. He was slowing down, and I 
wanted him to be able to walk on the flat. I also wanted him perhaps to 
revisit a walk of his youth, in the days when he and I got to know one 
another. We got out of the car, and he stood still. He stood still.</p>

<p>The vet told us he was in a great deal of pain. He was gone by the end of the 
week.</p>

<p>We have Tixall and Kinver now. But somehow I don’t want to take them on this 
walk. On this map without a map. My walk without Max.</p>

<figure>
    <img src="/assets/pics/Max.jpg" alt="Max" />
</figure>]]></content><author><name>Tom Chadwin</name></author><summary type="html"><![CDATA[My less than cartographic unsuccessful entry to @pinakographos's #MonoCarto competition]]></summary></entry></feed>